How to Troubleshoot That Thing Which You Don't Know how it Works.

We've all got things. Things sometimes break. Sometimes they aren't really broken, you just need to perform the correct Voodoo ritual.


Even if the something you have isn't understandable by humans, that's no reason not to give it a try. If you follow all these, exactly, you are sure to solve your problems...with the device in question.

I can totally fix it. These things go together, right?

1. Turn it off. Turn it back on.

2. Turn it off, wait 20 minutes, and turn it back on.

3. Unplug the fucker. Have a drink. Plug it back in.

4. Go into "Settings". Check the box that fixes the problem.

5. Jiggle the thingy.

6. Call tech support. After you get sick of waiting on hold, turn it off and back on again.

7. If there's a really expensive piece, you need that.

8. Make sure you are using an approved power cord that costs 10 times what it should.

9. Hit it.

10. Yell at it.

11. Invite a friend over who fixes this thing professionally. It'll almost surely work then, especially if you've left it powered off.

12. Check inside for the "Fixed/Broken" switch. If it's set to "Broken", flip it to "Fixed".

13. Get a new one.